from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
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I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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