Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize