I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize