Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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