Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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