I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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