Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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