The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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