Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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