the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
