I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
BRING THE BAGELS
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
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