he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Randomize
