Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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