You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
