I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
