Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
