i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
