My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
