You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
