It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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