i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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