its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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