1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
