I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
operation have a gay friend backfired
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
