She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
its liver damage thursday
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
