If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I could fuck to npr.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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