Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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