Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
