Three words: puerto rican gang bang
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Randomize
