How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
