he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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