Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
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