so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
worst night to have a conscience
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
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Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
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There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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