Just fell off a train. Bad.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
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