Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
That reminds me...we need to get swords
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
