The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
