Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
