Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
