dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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