This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize