I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
