Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
