Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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