omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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