You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
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Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
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Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
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