i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize