I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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