So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Randomize
