friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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