You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I FOUND THE LEGS
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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